In life, you will encounter people who will bring you down, criticize you, dislike you, verbally abuse you, etc. These are truly toxic people. They are poisonous and must be avoided or removed from your life at all costs. Thus, you must stand guard in the garden of your mind.
Stand Guard In the Garden Of Your Mind
If you were to envision yourself as a farmer who relies on his garden for healthy food and good nutrition you would be sure to treat your garden as the precious thing it is. You would water it, fertilize it, provide fresh soil, and closely monitor it on a daily basis. Now if you were to envision your mind as your garden you would be sure to be extremely cautious of what you allow to enter your mind. You would only allow positive thoughts and positive vibrations to enter. You would eat healthy, nutritious foods and drink a lot of water.
However, people often forget that people can also be just as negative, toxic and literally poisonous to their minds. In fact, it is often believed that you are the average of the five people you hang around the most. This is why you must be aware of who you spend your time with. If for some reason someone gives off a bad vibe toward you or may appear to act passive aggressive toward you, you must avoid any contact with that person or remove them from your life. These types of people are truly poisonous and will bring your energy down faster than you can blink.
Life is too short to be hanging around people who don’t believe in you, bring your energy down and who just simply don’t like you.
This relates so well to one of my favorite quotes:
“Not one ounce of my self worth depends on your acceptance of me.”
–Quincy Jones
Dealing With Toxic People In My Life
In my own life, I’ve encountered toxic people who have brought my energy down, who have acted passive aggressively toward me, were jealous of my successes and who have shown they simply don’t like me. These people have been strangers, acquaintances, friends and even family.
What was my solution?
First of all, I listened to their criticism of me, viewed it objectively and if there was some truth in their criticism I researched how I can get better in that area. Often times their criticism was untrue and for these people, I simply avoided contact with them or simply cut them out of my life.
As Joel Osteen says, you must
“Own your environment. Your environment is your kingdom and so you must own your kingdom. God created you as a king. Put up your wall and don’t allow any negativity to enter”.
As kings and queens of our lives, we must rule our selves, our environment and our days.
I understand it may be difficult to cut off close friends or family, but is your peace, happiness and fulfillment more important or is satisfying someone else’s more important?
“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”
-Eleanor Roosevelt
What Is Your Peace, Happiness, and Fulfillment Worth?
For me, any relationship whether blood related or not is not worth my peace, happiness and fulfillment. I have experienced this far too many times and in the end I am always the one to suffer. Experience has taught me that to live my best life, to become the greatest version of myself and in order to have a positive impact on humanity I must eradicate these toxic people from my life. If you cannot completely remove them from your life, like if they are family, you must simply avoid any and all communication with them. If communication is a must then keep it short and sweet and move the fuck on.
Lastly, I’ll leave you with this quote:
βDon’t let the expectations and opinions of other people affect your decisions. It’s your life, not theirs. Do what matters most to you; do what makes you feel alive and happy. Don’t let the expectations and ideas of others limit who you are. If you let others tell you who you are, you are living their reality β not yours. There is more to life than pleasing people. There is much more to life than following others’ prescribed path. There is so much more to life than what you experience right now. You need to decide who you are for yourself. Become a whole being. Adventure.β – Roy T. Bennett